You can read about the genesis of this album on the Opportunities to apologize album page. But after the genesis, this album was a long slog… a year and a half of near-constant work. I was also working… with a lot of overtime, as well as doing a practicum and taking classes and writing my masters thesis (titled Stewarding experience: re-presenting a journey toward and then away from identifying as an “addict”) that was based on this album.
Each song started with an initial draft of a lyric. Not all drafts ended up as songs. Some drafts that did end up as songs didn’t make it onto the album. Every draft lyric changed significantly through the process of being set to music – to the point that I would say they were transformed by the process.
On average I spent about 3 months on each song, probably about a third of that time recording voices and notes and instruments, a third of that time engineering and mixing, and a third of that time (intermixed with everything else) crying. What I like to say about the process of this album is that it took the 17-year period of my life that I spent thinking of and labeling myself an “addict” and didn’t revise or invalidate or erase it… but instead integrated it into a now-larger whole. I can still own that experience… it just isn’t all of me. Nor does it, or anything else, define me.